If you thought having one kid was hard, just wait until you have two, three or four! Actually, it doesn’t matter how many kids you have because it’s ALL just hard. But having multiple children does complicate matters a bit more than if you just stuck with one kid.
Having more than one kid is a lot of things, but it’ll never be dull – that’s for sure! Having more than one child means balancing different things, different personalities to deal with and parent, different wants, different needs…and just different everything. As you adjust to life with two, or three (or more), life can be stressful and chaotic.
But with a bit of intentional parenting, you’ll be able to manage it all and have a more peaceful life at home. Below are some useful tips on how to balance the chaos of having two or more kids (and not go too crazy).
1. Never Compare Your Kids
Each of your kids are totally different and none will be alike when it comes to personalities. But don’t feel bad if you sort of lean toward the kid that is being a saint at the moment (while their sibling is raising hell). Some kids are just easier to parent than others or you might have more in common with one of your kids over the other. But the key is to not show favoritism. Also, don’t compare them because each are different in their own way. If you do, you risk having your child feel less than in your eyes.
2. One-on-one Time Is Important
Try to have one-on-one time with each of your kids. Have regular schedules where you spend time with each kid so that they feel important and seen by you and your partner. Also, don’t let siblings interfere with that time because that’ll only send the message that you don’t care enough to fully focus on that one kid. This could make jealously worse.
3. Work On Stuff Together
It’s all about adding balance with multiple kids. To do this, try adding projects that you do as a family. It could could be cleaning up, cooking, playing games or working on a special project outside. Working as a family team makes all your kids feel appreciated and loved, while the task helps with communication, cooperation and teamwork.
4. Set Expectations In The AM
We all have busy schedules. Try setting expectations for the day in the morning with your family, outlining what needs to be done and when you’ll be available for each child or for all the kids. Knowing what to expect for the day and the activities will allow them to know what’s coming and where they fit into everything.
5. Divide & Conquer
If you have another adult in the home (your partner), it might be a good idea to divide and conquer all of these parenting strategies. Making a plan on how to do it all together will save a lot of stress and headaches.
6. Have A Routine
You’ll hear it everywhere about how kids ned to have a routine. That’s because kids usually act our more when they don’t know what’s coming and when things are unpredictable. It doesn’t need to be strict, just something that’s semi predictable. But also make sure that you still have the routine work naturally with and for your family.
7. Embrace Their Individuality
All your kids have different personalities and interests, as well as learning styles, preferences and likes. Try to slow down to really consider what you know about their temperament and personality. Try different techniques on how to parent them so that it’s more effective instead of a one-size-fits-all approach. Try to be flexible and embrace who they are when interacting with them.
8. Be Mindful
Try to minimize your distractions each day so that you can practice being there with your kids each day. Put away your electronics and be as fully present with them in whatever way you can.
Having more than one kid isn’t always easy, but as long as you have a plan of action, you’ll be able to balance the chaos and have a peaceful family dynamic!